Welcome to another insightful episode of Speak in Flow with your host, Melinda Lee! In today’s episode, we delve into the intricacies of understanding and managing complaints, exploring the art of responding constructively and turning challenges into solutions. So, buckle up for a journey of empathy, curiosity, and actionable strategies.
Understanding the Why Behind Complaints:
Melinda encourages listeners to dive deeper into the root causes of complaints, emphasizing the importance of empathy. By approaching complaints with an empathetic mindset, we gain a richer understanding of the underlying issues.
Discover the power of curiosity as Melinda guides you through the process of entering the complainant’s perspective. Uncover the layers beyond the surface-level dissatisfaction and open the door to more meaningful connections.
Explore the three crucial lenses to view complaints through: empathy, curiosity, and a solutions-oriented mindset. Learn how these perspectives can transform complaints from mere grievances into opportunities for growth and improvement.
Constructive Responses to Complaints:
Melinda shares practical tips on responding constructively to complaints. From active listening techniques to acknowledging emotions, she provides actionable strategies for turning a potentially negative interaction into a positive exchange.
Uncover the art of validating feelings without necessarily agreeing with the complaint. Melinda guides you through the delicate balance of expressing understanding while maintaining a solutions-focused approach.
Three Steps to Manage Complaints:
Delve into the three essential steps Melinda recommends for effectively managing complaints. These steps serve as a roadmap for navigating through challenges and finding resolution.
Gain insights into how acknowledging, addressing, and implementing solutions can create a positive feedback loop, fostering a culture of continuous improvement.
Turning Complaints into Solutions:
Melinda explores the transformative process of turning complaints into opportunities for positive change. Discover when and how to shift the focus from the problem to potential solutions.
Learn how a proactive mindset can not only resolve the immediate issue but also prevent similar complaints in the future. Melinda shares real-world examples of successful complaint-to-solution transformations.
In this episode of Speak in Flow, Melinda Lee takes you on a journey to unravel the intricacies of complaints. Through the lenses of empathy, curiosity, and solutions, you’ll discover a new perspective on turning challenges into opportunities for growth. Join us in cultivating a communication style that fosters understanding, connection, and positive change.
Melinda Lee is a Presentation Skills Expert, Speaking Coach and nationally renowned Motivational Speaker. She holds an M.A. in Organizational Psychology, is an Insights Practitioner, and is a Certified Professional in Talent Development as well as Certified in Conflict Resolution. For over a decade, Melinda has researched and studied the state of “flow” and used it as a proven technique to help corporate leaders and business owners amplify their voices, access flow, and present their mission in a more powerful way to achieve results.
She has been the TEDx Berkeley Speaker Coach and worked with hundreds of executives and teams from Facebook, Google, Microsoft, Caltrans, Bay Area Rapid Transit System, and more. Currently, she lives in San Francisco, California, and is breaking the ancestral lineage of silence.
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Welcome, dear listeners to a speak in flowMelinda Lee:
podcast episode we are going to talk about complaints today.Melinda Lee:
Complaints complaints. I mean, it seems like they're everywhereMelinda Lee:
in our chaos and complexity and people with bad moods. It justMelinda Lee:
seems like we can't break free from them. And so I wanted toMelinda Lee:
dedicate an episode on how do we manage and navigate theseMelinda Lee:
complaints. I think it's important for us, and we'reMelinda Lee:
building our relationships. And so what are complaints, whenMelinda Lee:
someone complains to us, that means that they're neitherMelinda Lee:
there, they're dissatisfied with something, their expectation isMelinda Lee:
not being met. And usually, when they're complaining, there's aMelinda Lee:
lot of emotion on top of it, they're frustrated, they'reMelinda Lee:
angry, they're disappointed, they could just be blurting outMelinda Lee:
things and directing them at you, whether it's your fault orMelinda Lee:
not, it doesn't really matter, but they are just doing it. AndMelinda Lee:
so in the moment, it can be, it can feel really uncomfortable,Melinda Lee:
because we, as a receiver can get really defensive. And ifMelinda Lee:
we're not careful, we're going to refute back, we're going toMelinda Lee:
yell back and and then we're going to disconnect from theMelinda Lee:
relationship. There is uncomfortable this and thenMelinda Lee:
there's tension. And then so we want to avoid that. And so hereMelinda Lee:
are some three things that you can do when someone complains atMelinda Lee:
you. The first is listen with empathy.Melinda Lee:
Second is get real curious. And third is open it up forMelinda Lee:
solutions. So the first is, listen with empathy. WhenMelinda Lee:
someone complains, just take a deep breath, and just go intoMelinda Lee:
curiosity mode. Oftentimes, we can be defensive and yell back.Melinda Lee:
And so I highly recommend just taking some deep breaths, takingMelinda Lee:
a step back and and then move into curiosity. Start to ask,Melinda Lee:
Oh, tell me more. You're upset by this? I didn't do what youMelinda Lee:
want it. So tell me more about that. What is happening? And soMelinda Lee:
ask questions and and ask continue to ask questions. TellMelinda Lee:
me more. Tell me more. And they'll continue to tell you theMelinda Lee:
story. Or you can also start to do some mirroring, labelling,Melinda Lee:
which means that you just paraphrase what they said, Oh, IMelinda Lee:
didn't meet your needs, oh, I failed to meet with you at aMelinda Lee:
certain time, or I didn't deliver your task on time. SoMelinda Lee:
just paraphrasing what they're saying. And really go in withMelinda Lee:
curiosity. So don't I think sometimes if we tried to doMelinda Lee:
mirroring and labelling, we will feel like we're condescending,Melinda Lee:
or we're doing it just to check off the box. And that was goingMelinda Lee:
to you know, create some defensiveness in them. You doMelinda Lee:
want to go in with genuine curiosity. And leave mirroringMelinda Lee:
labelling will come so naturally, because you'reMelinda Lee:
curious, you're like, what does that mean? Where is this comingMelinda Lee:
from? Because underneath the emotion, you want to goMelinda Lee:
underneath all that as they continue to tell you more,Melinda Lee:
they're going to tell you the story of what has happened toMelinda Lee:
them. And then therefore you can get into the needs, what isMelinda Lee:
their true needs, underneath that, you're going to find out aMelinda Lee:
lot of information. And then once they do that, they're goingMelinda Lee:
to be more receptive to talking about potential solutions.Melinda Lee:
Because the reason why they're complaining is because actuallyMelinda Lee:
they do want us, someone around us to hear them. And then nowMelinda Lee:
open up the door to what can we do about this? What do you whatMelinda Lee:
do you recommend? What do you propose? What are someMelinda Lee:
solutions, or some ways that we can work together? What are someMelinda Lee:
ways to help alleviate to get you what you want? And so openMelinda Lee:
up the door for the third is solutions, but only after you'veMelinda Lee:
demonstrated the first listening with empathy. Second, gettingMelinda Lee:
curious and then going into what can we do about this togetherMelinda Lee:
and really partnering to find some common ground to find someMelinda Lee:
common solutions that will then create this connection again,Melinda Lee:
that will then increase some possibilities that both of youMelinda Lee:
together separately may not come up with. And so moving into openMelinda Lee:
brainstorming and and ideas of what can be some solutions.Melinda Lee:
So that is how you can handle complaints. I know that there isMelinda Lee:
a lot of a lot of people that are struggling and dealing withMelinda Lee:
a lot. And so for you to take that step forward to unleashingMelinda Lee:
your voice. It requires that we rise above the noise, the chaos,Melinda Lee:
the fear, the frustration and know that these are all justMelinda Lee:
underneath that could Be emotions. And when we can riseMelinda Lee:
above these limiting negative emotions, and coming in withMelinda Lee:
curiosity, coming in with listening, and then opening upMelinda Lee:
the door underneath all of that our possibilities are solutionsMelinda Lee:
that we can create together and move toward a partnership andMelinda Lee:
into a deeper relationship, even when it's uncomfortable, evenMelinda Lee:
when things have not or expectations have not been met.Melinda Lee:
Once you hear them, we can close the door on that I'll create aMelinda Lee:
vehicle for connection for change, and more meaningfulMelinda Lee:
relationships. So I hope that you could take these tips todayMelinda Lee:
on how to navigate complaints in our crazy chaotic world rise. IMelinda Lee:
am your sister in flow. Until next episode, I hope you takeMelinda Lee:
care and go out and lead with your heart